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Nape Voted Sexiest Place to Stab With a Halberd

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Nape Voted Sexiest Place to Stab With a Halberd

Ankles were a close 2nd

Jan Lionsnest
Nov 14, 2023
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Nape Voted Sexiest Place to Stab With a Halberd

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The King's Knights hath spoken, and the nape of the neck hath once again been selected as the sexiest place on the body to stab with a halberd!

“Whilst there beeth many fyne places on a peasant's body in which to thrust the tip of thy halberd, the nape hath consistently proven to be the sexiest,” spake Sir Halvin von Spontoonsen. “There beeth nothing that maketh mine blood run hotte like the sight of a bared peasant nape primed for the sticking.”

‘Twas a close competition this year, and many other sexy body parts remained in the running right up ‘til the end. The ankle and proboscis finished close behind, though ultimately both proved too fleeting and difficult to stab with a large and unwieldy halberd. Whilst the nape also remains the hottest location to chop with a battle axe, the torso gained ground on it this year in voting, perhaps indicating a shift in stabbing tastes.

“Personally, I’m an ankle fan,” spake Amblard the Ankle-skewer. “But I understand that most people have never seen an ankle close up, and may not even know what it is. So I can understand if they don’t get the allure of it.”


Here is the survey by the numbers:

†Results do not include those who were stabbed in the nape whilst taking the survey.

So, loyal subjects of the Crowne, if thou happens to have a bared nape or ankle, goeth out and bear it for The King's Halberdmen so they may run it through in ecstasy!

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Nape Voted Sexiest Place to Stab With a Halberd

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Nape Voted Sexiest Place to Stab With a Halberd

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Jennifer Morrow
Writes Autumn Lives Here
Nov 14Liked by Jan Lionsnest

I'm surprised by the high percentage of those not attracted to wounds at all. I suspect these are just people who have never encountered a sexy wound before.

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David Perlmutter
Writes Made From What's Not Real
Nov 14Liked by Jan Lionsnest

I beith one of thee 6% not attracted to the wounds.

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