King Considers Building Road to Accompany Tolls
In a moste generous move which shall benefit all the peoples of the Realm by allowing them the opportunity to give the govournment more monies, His Majesty The King is considering building a road to accompany the Kingdom’s many tolls.
“The construction of a road shall add to the many preexisting benefits of the Royal Tolls to The King’s subjects, such as not being killed for refusing to pay and filling the Royal Coffers with thy hard-earned coin,” sayeth Royal Highwayman Culvert Boothvayne. “Although the cost of each toll will have to be increased to pay for the road’s construction.”
His Majesty’s toll collectors have long been asking for a road, which will maketh it easier for them to travel from town to town extorting tolls from the people there.
For many a year they hath been forced to collect at low-traffic mountain passes and bridges. Operating these remote tolls often becomes so expensive that additional tolls have to be created just to pay for the original tolls. But a new toll road may increase revenues from foote and horse traffic tenfold.
“In the pre-road days, mineself would sometymes sit at a river crossing for four or fife moons without a single traveller needing to cross,” sayeth toll collector Ellaryfitz Tollman. “By the tyme someone did want to cross, I’d be so desperate for coinage that I’d have to murder them and steal everything they had just to meet my quarterly toll quota.”
“But methinks I shall have no problem meeting my quota on a road. And anyone I murder shall be by choice rather than necessity.”
At ye presse tyme, the Royal Highwayman announced that only The King and His toll collectors would be allowed to use the new road but that tolls would nonetheless be doubled to pay for it.