In a moste magnificent gesture from the Clothiers Guild, peasant clothes hath now been made available for all lowbornes in a new shade of pale brown.
“No longer do our peasants and serfs have to toil away in the old-fashioned shades of pale brown and tannish-grey burlap that were previously the only colours available,” sayeth Rileyo Taiylorre, a spokesman for the Guild. “Now they can work their lieges’ fields in style in a brand new shade of pale brown which is slightly paler and yet browner than those previously on the market.”
The new colour wast developed after many liegelords complained about how dull it was watching their peasants toil all day in the same one or two shades of dingy rags.
“‘Tis a dramatic improvement o’er the previous drab,” sayeth Sir Hemstley, who hath just outfitted many of his vassals in the new garments. “I enjoy watching my peasants suffer more already.”
The new shade, which is being called “faded umber,” is made from discarded textiles unfit to touch the skin of noble personages. ‘Twill be added to a palette of garb which includes classics like “dark drab,” “light drab,” and “used to be white but now smeared in mudde and fæculence.”
“Mine new faded umber tunic is a vast improvement o’er my previous tunic, which was just a torn barleysack I had worn since I was a child,” sayeth local barleyfarmer Chorin Barleysacke. “Though I must admit mine eyes are half-blind from long days spent working in the sun and I can’t really see colours anymore. But I’m told it looks grand.”
At ye presse tyme, the Clothiers Guild announced it was testing a new type of womyn’s corset that doesn’t suffocate its wearer.